Bitter Shards
by Jocasta Silver
Summary: This is the time to make choices that will change everything. One-shot collection inspired by "The Jedi Masters" mod by Trex
1. Bitter Symphony

Author's Note: I got this idea from playing the Kotor 2 mod "The Jedi Masters" which was created by the amazingly talented Trex. Pairings include Bastila/Revan, Atton/Exile, Brianna/Mical, and Boran/LSFemalePc. There are spoilers for one of the mod endings so don't read if you don't wanted to be spoiled. So without further ado, here is "Bitter Symphony".

Disclaimer: I don't own _Knights of the Old Republic_ or _The Jedi Masters_ mod. They both belong to their respective owners.

Bitter Symphony

Revan found her sitting by the stream, far away from the shouts and exclamations of the celebration. The excess of revelry-fireworks, a live band, and a bona fide military awards ceremony- were not surprising given that the people of Dantooine lacked anything to celebrate in a long time. However, he could not blame Doctor Alyssa Sands for wanting to escape from all the excitement.

He sat on the log, and calmly faced her. "Are you ok?"

Alyssa sighed. "I guess I'm ok, I just can't stop thinking about Kannos. I replay the events over and over in my mind, and I can't help but wonder if there would have been a way to save him, or stop what the Syyth did to him from happening in the first place."

He really wasn't surprised that she was pondering this. He'd replayed many moments in his own life, and pondered what would have occurred if he had done things differently. "Kannos made his own choices and you made yours. In the end, you did save him, by convincing him to sacrifice himself to defeat the Syyth."

"Yeah, but he was a friend in some ways, and Force! How am I supposed to explain all this to Nizzal?" When he gave her a quizzical look, she explained. "Nizzal was his pseudo-girlfriend, I guess. He was shy about expressing his feelings, but I set up a meeting between the two of them, and she seemed to reciprocate."

"Just tell her the truth," he advised. "That Kannos sacrificed himself, and saved the galaxy from a great evil."

"Does it ever get better?" she inquired. "I mean it must have been hard for you. After the Star Forge, I mean."

"Huh? Oh, that. It wasn't really that hard, at least at first." Before he got the memories back of all the times, he and Alek had shared back in the days they were two mischievous Padawans without a care in their minds, besides their upcoming knighting ceremony. "After I regained my memories, well there were times I wondered what would have happened if I had done things differently."

"So it like this for everyone?"

Revan chuckled. "Not really. Meetra doesn't seem to brood about what she went through and what she did. Then again, she never was one to deal in the what ifs. Carth pretty much throws himself into his work and spending as much time with his son Dustil as he can. Bastila occasionally has nightmares from time to time, but she's stable considering the torture she endured. You're the only one who's expressed any real doubt about how events played out."

"Yeah."

"I did try to save him, you know," he stated suddenly. "In spite of him hurting Bastila and destroying planets, I had to try, because if our roles were reversed, that's what I'd hope someone would do for me. That's probably not something they put in the history books you've studied."

"No, it's not," she agreed. "But you know, maybe what you said about Kannos and me is true of you and Alek. That you made your choices and he made his choices and in the end it worked the way it did to save the galaxy."

"That's an interesting way of thinking about it."

"Hey!" a young brown haired boy who could not be more then about twenty standard years stepped into the shore. "Where have you been Alyssa? I've been looking everywhere for you."

"I was just trying to get away from the noise for a bit, I'll join you in a minute cyare." She winked at him. This pacified him somewhat and he left heading straight for the middle of the action.

"Wasn't that?"

"Yes, that was Boran also known as Mandalore's son, and Jedi in training."

"Isn't he your apprentice?"

"Yeah, now that you mention it, yes." She blushed slightly, probably reliving steamy romantic encounters with the young Mandolorian. "Don't worry; I try to take things slow, since he's never been with anyone before."

"I wasn't going to say anything." In fact, the young couple reminded him of himself and Bastila, especially in the early days right after the destruction of the Star Forge, before the dreams of the past began to haunt him.

"I guess I'd better go back to him now." She moved up the path slightly then stopped. "And Revan?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks for talking with me. What you said really helped." However, as she left, he reflected that perhaps, she had also helped him bury part of his own past.

….

She weaved through the crowd of Jedi, Republic soldiers, and farmers. Among them were Atton and Meetra, their arms weaving around a young girl who must be their daughter, from her appearance, which was a combination of both of their features. Mical sat next to an Echani woman about his age, with two white blond haired children who were indistinguishable apart from the length of their hair.

At last, she found him, leaning against a wall. "Hey," she said simply, before placing her arms around him.

Boran smiled. "Hey yourself."

"You've been ok without me right?"

He shrugged. "Fine, apart from everyone acting like I'm some hero since I'm technically a Jedi, and Dad deciding that now was a good time to give me the "talk"."

She blushed slightly in response. "Sorry about that."

He shook his head. "Don't be, that kiss was completely worth it. Besides, that was nothing compared to the date in the cantina."

She blushed even redder, as her thoughts trailed back to what happened at her penthouse. How he had kissed her, and looked at her, as if she were most amazing being he had ever met. She had been with other men before, but Boran was unique and special, at least to her. "Yeah, well actually I've been thinking that maybe someday, after you get knighted and stuff we might…." She paused, nervous to continue.

"We might what?" Boran asked his blue eyes exceedingly gentle.

"We might get married someday."

At first, she wondered if she had spoken too soon about matrimony. However, he smiled, and lightly kissed her cheek, sending electric spasms through her body. "Yeah, that sounds like a wonderful idea, although I might warn you that Dad will probably expect us to get married Mandolorian style."

She simply shrugged. "We'll cross that bridge when we arrive at it."For now, she focused on the man who was her one and only true match.

….

Bastila found him after the party had long since winded down, lying on the grass, watching as the waters of the stream flowed by. "I've been looking all over for you." He did not reply and simply continued to stay into the ever-flowing waters. "You're not wearing your armor or mask anymore."

"After being stuck with only that blasted thing to wear for fourteen years, I decided I needed a change. Especially after the Senate pretty much decided that my wardrobe choice meant I couldn't be trusted."

"I always thought you looked better in Jedi robes," she admitted, as she lay down next to him.

Revan grinned, a part of his old mischievous self-returning. "And why would that be Ms. Shan?"

She returned his grin with a sly smirk of her own. "They're so much easier to take off."

He laughed, and for a moment the pair snuggled, the concerns of the outside world not mattering in the slightest. "Bastila?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever wondered what would have happened if Malak and I hadn't invaded the Republic?"

She sighed. "I think we've had this conversation a dozen times before, Revan."

"And we'll probably have it a dozen more times," he added. "I was talking with Alyssa earlier, and it got me thinking again. Did I really do the right thing to try to protect the Republic from the Syyth? Should I have worked with the Republic instead of against it?"

"You know, you and Alyssa were both faced with difficult decisions and you both did your best with what fate gave you. Besides, if it hadn't been for the choices you made, we probably would have never met." He smiled, and tried to continue snuggling, but she got up and dusted off her robes. "Come on Revan. I think it's about time you met Vaner."

"You mean the kid you named after me? Bastila, I know you missed me, but that kid probably gets called at least five different things for having such a weird name."

"Are you implying that your name is weird?"

"No, but seriously you couldn't have given him a more ordinary name, like Derek, or Jason."

As they continued to playfully argue about Vaner's name, Bastila reflected that this was how life was. People making the best choices they could with what fate gifted them, and trying to improve their lives as best as they could. As it always would be with the Force flowing through it all.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this one-shot and as always please read and review. I can't stress that I don't criticism as long as its constructive, as it helps improve my writing.


	2. Reflections

Author's Note: While playing "The Jedi Masters" mod, I got the idea for another one-shot from Kannos's perspective. So here it is.

Disclaimer: I don't own this mod, or "Knights of the Old Republic". They both belong to their respective owners.

Reflections

"Redemption is not perfection. The redeemed must recognize their imperfections."-John Piper

The Force was power, and the Da'arth Syyth was the apex of what could be accomplished through power. It was through this power that he gracefully dodged and parried all of Revan's moves. Kannos was far from the pathetic weak little youngling that the Jedi suggested should find a different path outside the order. He struck hurricanes of Force lightning, only for Revan to reflect them right back. He hit the deck hard, and a needle-sharp pain shot through his back. Kannos grimaced, as the slimy, dark abyss that was the Syyth ripped at his very soul. That was only downside to such power; the Syyth fed and would eventually consume him completely over time. However, the process would take many decades, and Kannos preferred to focus on the present instead of pondering about the future. He struggled to his feet.

Suddenly, the door swung open wide, heralding the arrival of Alyssa Sands, aka. Doctor Sands. Her chin length scarlet hair was in disarray rather than its usual immaculate curls, and there were slight purple shadows under her blue-gray eyes. Kannos' throat involuntarily tightened. Surely, she had not lost any sleep because of him. After all, they had been associates, nothing more, nothing less. He struggled to focus on Revan.

"If you don't mind, I have a duel to win," he spat.

"I'm here to fight by Revan's side," Alyssa declared calmly.

Kannos chuckled. "Unfortunately, I have the upper hand. Even if you did emerge from this duel victorious, the Syyth only possesses those who are aligned with the dark side. Both of you are bona fide Jedi, meaning the Syyth cannot possess you."

"Kannos listen to me," Alyssa begged. "Even if you do win, the Syyth will consume you. It doesn't know power, only destruction."

For a moment, Kannos hesitated. He knew, deep down inside that this power was consuming him from within, but no! He would not listen! He was the invincible Darth Syyth! "No!" he screamed. "I'm tired of your preaching Sands. Now it is time to battle!"

He slashed and hacked, struggling the parry the combined forces of Revan and Sands. By themselves, he could have bested either of them. Together however, they were a formidable pair. He Force pushed them back, and pulled from the Syyth's darkness, "healing" himself.

"You know you can't defeat me," he taunted.

"Kannos, what about Nizzal?"

"What about her?" He attempted to sound nonchalant, but hearing her name sent many memories he struggled to suppress echoing through his brain. The gentle gleam in her eyes when they first met, the grateful smile on her face when he slew her heartless husband, and most of all, the slight crooked smile she posted in his direction the last time they met.

"If you destroy the galaxy, you'll destroy her as well."

Her words cut him, enraging him more. How dare she claim to know how he felt, never mind that she was the one who arranged the meeting with Nizzal, embracing the power of the Da'arth Syyth.

_"But what would Nizzal think of what you've done?" _a soft voice murmured in his head. He screamed, deafening the voice, and slashed at Alyssa. Revan leaped, blocking the lightsaber strike with both of his sabers, which only fueled the fires of Kannos's anger. They backed him into one of the posts, and as Kannos stared into the whites of Sands's eyes, he finally saw himself. A white skinned man, with purple bruises around his cheeks that only accented his hatred filled crimson eyes. What a monster he was, a heartless monster. One Nizzal did not deserve. He sheathed his lightsaber.

"You know what a lunlacka is Doctor Sands?" he inquired almost politely. When she shook her head, he continued. "A lunlacka is when an Etti finds his or her purpose in life. I have found my lunlacka."

"Thank you Kannos," Sands smiled. "I knew there was still good in you."

"Hold off on the celebrations, Alyssa. There's something I need to do first." He concentrated, and tugged, pulling the wrecked _Ebon Hawk_ out of the _Nemesis_. While the ship had obviously seen better days, it was still space worthy. "If you want to leave, I'd do so about now. I must see to destruction of the Syyth."

"Good-bye Kannos," Alyssa murmured, salty tears streaming down her eyes.

Revan said, nothing, but Kannos sensed the slightest quivering of respect behind his helmet, and that was all Kannos could ask for. As the _Ebon Hawk_ launched and sped off into light speed, Kannos focused and directed the darkness towards him. The Syyth struggled futilely, but the darkness consumed him and the fleet of ships. As he blacked out, his last thought was Nizzal, and the red-haired doctor who against all odds had become the closest thing he had had to a family member in a long time.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this one-shot and as always, please read and review.


End file.
